luv thyself series - prompt #3

hello loves 💗 (i'm debating on giving the few of you that read my blog a fandom name 💀 you can blame the k-pop bands for that). hope you're doing well, staying hydrated💧, and having a good morning or wrapping up a happy day depending on when you read this. you already know what time it is 😌 self-love journal prompt #3! once again, all 25 prompts can be found here: https://selflovecircle.co.uk/self-love-journal-prompts/

prompt #3: what part of your life are you happy with?

that's a question i ask myself very often these days. not much has been going the way i planned in my life. in fact, if you read my "how it began" page, it's one of the reasons this blog exists. 2020 was one hell of a year. it started off with me struggling in a relationship. it was one of the biggest chapters of my life that i had to sort out and finally close. till this day i am still healing and growing from the toxicity of it. there are some small wounds that haven't quite closed. to sprinkle some more chaos on top of that, covid-19 altered life for everyone. the choir trip that my school was going to sing at got cancelled AS WE WERE LOADING THE BUS! after that, quarantine started, and i was always locked up in the house. i haven't been employed in over a year (i have a side job right now, but i don't know how long that will last). i live with my parents, my grandma, and my little sister. with my parents and grandma being 50+, it's imperative that i do not risk them getting sick. things got even messier once my first semester of junior year in college started. i realized, i did not like what i was learning and doing. given the online factor made it worse, i truly didn't see what i was doing for class as my career. i chose to major in music technology because music has been my biggest passion, but it quickly hit me that the technology part was not for me.

that brings me to where i am. i am currently taking a gap semester because i needed some time to rethink my path. i have been a person of abundant interests all of my life. because of my plethora of passions, it can be hard to just choose one thing and stick with it. so, i'm figuring that out now. i say ALL of this to say, it doesn't seem like there is much that i'm happy with in my life.

despite the craziness of last year though, i would say one part of my life that i am happy with is how i am learning and trying out new things, and that i am privileged enough to do so. i have been trying to be more productive, so i started trying different methods, such as lists, the pomodoro method, etc. this blog! this blog is something i've worked on since last semester, and i am so happy to be writing and having a creative outlet i can come to. i have learned how to rollerskate a little bit. i've learned how to properly write and read in vietnamese (still a struggle though). i've picked up beginner level korean. i've been writing creatively more often. i've been exploring possible career fields of interest and used social media to my advantage in educating and exposing myself to more.

though sometimes i feel directionless, i am happy that i am in a place where i can test out things. i am in a place where i can learn more than i ever have before. also, i am so lucky to be able to do so. for that, i am forever grateful. i know that not everyone can just take a gap semester. not everyone can choose a career they enjoy. not everyone has their family together and healthy. not everyone has the time to try the things i do. i am in a privileged position, and will always keep that in mind, even if sometimes i am not happy with where i'm at. it's not the best, but it sure as hell isn't a bad place.

this universe is full of surprises. it is never what we want it to be. it is never perfect nor will it ever be. life will be hard and unfair. as an idealist, i hate that, but i have come to terms with it. i do hope that you can see that there is at least one part of your life that you can be happy with. i hope you all find that one part and water it until it touches the other parts with its joy 🌱✨

once again, read the last few posts if you haven't. try these exercises out for yourself. they truly help you reflect. comment below your answer to today's prompt. thank you to the few that read. i hope the family grows 🥰

forever grateful,

helen 🤍